03/05/10
11:00 AM
I get a call from Mr X, who claims to be calling on behalf of XYZ Bank and is offering me a premium segment credit card from the bank. I like the offer and agree to take the card.
11:30 AM
Ms Y calls from the same bank to verify certain details and ask me to be ready with the copies of all the necessary documents. She informs me that one of the Bank's agents would visit me at my office in the afternoon to collect the documents.
4:30 PM
Mr Z from the XYZ bank visits me at my office and I hand over the relevant document copies to him and fill the necessary details on the application from.
(The funny part begins now)
04/05/10
2:00 PM
I get a call from Ms Y and the conversation goes something like this:
Ms Y: Sir I am calling from XYZ bank regarding your credit card application and need to verify certain details.
Me: Ok.
Ms Y: Sir, you stay in a rented place in Mumbai or owned? (this was already mentioned by me in the form)
Me: Rented.
Ms Y: What is your permanent address?
Me: I have a house in my village but nobody lives there anymore, will that work?
Ms Y: No sir. Where do your parents stay?
Me: My parents live in Kanpur, but that place again is rented.
Ms Y: Sir, do you have a landline there?
Me: No.
Ms Y: Sir, in that case when you get a call from our head office confirming for details, please tell them that you live with your parents.
Me: But I don't live with my parents, so why should I lie.
Ms Y: Sir, otherwise you would not get the card.
Me: Then please don't give me the card. Reject my application.
Ms Y: Sir, there is nothing wrong in it, there is anyways no hard verification for such things.
Me: But I would not lie for getting a credit card. I already have other bank's cards and in no desperate need for additional card.
Ms Y: Ok sir.
(She hangs up.)
As soon as she hangs up, I get a call from Mr X, who sold me the card.
Mr X: Sir, this is X from XYZ bank.
Me: Yes X, tell me.
Mr X: Sir, I need a small favour from you.
Me: If it is to lie about my details, forget it. I don't need your card.
Mr X: At least you can say that you are married. (he was one step ahead)
Me: Listen X. You have a criteria to issue this credit card and it seems I don't fulfill the criteria. So you simply reject my application. I wont mind.
Mr X: No sir. You fulfill all the criteria and would be a valuable customer for us.
Me: Then give me the card. Why are you making such a simple thing so complicated?
Mr X: But sir, if you have a rented place in Mumbai, you will have to either be married of living with your family to get the card.
Me: Which means I don't satisfy the necessary criteria.
Mr X: If you could just say you are married, your application will be processed.
Me: Listen X, I don't like to lie.
Mr X: But sir, it's no problem, you don't have to produce any evidence.
Me: It's not about evidence. I am just not the kind of person who would lie to get a credit card. You are asking me to change as a person to just get a credit card.
Mr X: Ok sir, we will forward your application.
Me: Thank you.
I thought the conversation was over.
05/05/10
2:35 PM
I was just out of a long meeting and to my surprise I again receive a call from XYZ Bank. This time it was a new person, lets call her Ms A.
Ms A: Sir, I am calling on behalf of XYZ Bank. Just needed to verify certain details.
Me: Please go ahead.
Ms A: Sir, your date of birth is 04/07/1983.
Me: That's correct.
Ms A: You live in a rented apartment in Mumbai.
Me: Yes.
Ms A: For how long you are staying in this place.
Me: Almost one and half year.
Ms A: Sir, when you get a call from our office for verification, just tell then you are married.
Me: I think I have been through this before with X and I clearly told him I am not gonna supply any false information. You can happily reject my application.
Ms A: Sir then can you give us your parents land line no.?
Me: They don't have a land line.
Ms A: Any neighbors no.?
Me: No.
Ms A: Sir any friends' contact nos.
Me: Are you out of your mind. I don't understand what my friends', family's or neighbors' nos are relevant for my credit card application and I am not going to provide you any. Please reject my application and don't bother me with such ridiculous calls again.
I am hoping I don't get another call tomorrow.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
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